Sunday, February 8

How it Started

People often ask me how I got into energy medicine. The answer is simple: I experienced it. My first time receiving energy work was on retreat eight years ago. The experience broke open a level of self work that I never knew existed. It confirmed that my spiritual life wasn't all in my imagination, but rather a real world of mysticism within me. I felt simultaneously comforted and challenged, rooted and in flight, profoundly human and profoundly divine, heartbreakingly loved, acutely aware of my brokenness, but also of its impermanence. At that time in my life, I was deep in trenches dug by emotional abuse at the hands of someone I loved, an eating disorder, and a self-destructive desire to please everyone. Energy Therapy shed light on the grace in my life at a time when darkness threatened to blind me. It breathed life into my courage so I could find a way out of self-hatred. It honored where I was and gently ushered me forward into a new way of being in myself and the world. It helped me grow into the woman I am today.

From the moment I received it, I knew I was called to share it.

If you're curious and want to dip your toe into the world of energy work, I'm offering two little classes: Energy Intensive I and Energy Intensive II. We'll talk about protecting your energy field, the beautiful complexity of your chakric system, and how to practice all kinds of energy techniques on yourself.

The Anatomy of Resistance

At the beginning of every Energy Therapy session, I go through an inner routine: centering, grounding, attunement. Centering allows me to fully inhabit my body. It's the practice of stretching my soul into the farthest reaches of my fingertips and toes. Centering reifies who I am and how I want to feel during the session. It enables me to keep a crisp boundary between your energy and mine. Grounding often consists of imagining actual roots growing deeper into the ground and anchoring around the fiery earth center. The final step, attunement, is all about you. It's when I step into your energy field and vibration. It's the first time I fully feel what's going on in your chakric system. Those first few seconds feel like the tuning of an orchestra. A beautiful cacophony of emotions, stories, and scars, some clearer than others.

After that first sequence, I check your Chakras with my pendulum and begin to clear, align, and heal. The work tends to flow seamlessly as your energy field shifts and responds to intentions and movement. However, in almost every session there's a split second when I want to run away from the task at hand. That's the moment I relish most because it tells me I'm standing toe to toe with your resistance. As with any practice, your place of resistance is a barrier to work through and a compass pointing to where needs the most attention. Meeting your resistance allows me to identify your places of deepest need and figure out how to best meet those needs and set you free.

If you're curious and want to dip your toe into the world of energy work, I'm offering two little classes: Energy Intensive I and Energy Intensive II. We'll talk about protecting your energy field, the beautiful complexity of your chakric system, and how to practice all kinds of energy techniques on yourself.

Friday, December 12

An Easy Body

You know those women who seem to have all the physical features you envy wrapped up in one glorious, flawless body? I had a name for those women or, more accurately, their bodies. I called them easy bodies. In my comparison addled mind, they were perfect. They had it easy. Please laugh at the absolute absurdity of this and be compassionate with yourself if you still frequent the comparison vortex. We all get pulled in from time to time.
Thankfully, I learned a long time ago that having a certain body type doesn’t mean your life is more or less easy than someone with a different body type. I caught myself thinking she has such an easy body the other day about an acquaintance. And then I chose a thought I’ve never consciously chosen before: I have an easy body, too. Several hours later, I reflected on that thought and realized that an easy body means something totally different to me now. Over this past year, a term I used spitefully and with a tinge of jealousy and self-hatred has turned into a celebration.
What I see when I look at a woman with an easy body is not her actual shape, but rather how she inhabits it.
I see a woman sated by her life.
I see a woman deeply in love with every curve of her complexity.
I see a woman that takes pleasure in the rise of her hungers and relishes the adventure of feeding them.
I see a woman at home in the temple of her bones and blood.
I see a woman unafraid of surrendering.
I see a woman unapologetically honest about her needs, desires, values and boundaries.
I see a woman in passionate pursuit of her own heart.
I see a woman who has unbridled her joy.
I see a woman sure of her strength.
I see a woman creating the poetry of her soul.
I see a woman immensely gentle with herself and the world.
I see a woman set loose.
I see a woman awash in pleasure.
I see a woman awake.
I see a woman who uses her body as a compass.
I see a woman at peace.
I see a woman.
About halfway through that list, I realized I was talking about myself more than anyone. That’s what I see when I look in the mirror. And it doesn’t matter if I’m having a crazy hair day or my jeans won’t button. All of those qualities and freedoms and breathtaking beauty are not contingent on my body type. They’re the outcome of self-love.
What do you see when you look in the mirror? And how does that view color the way you see other women?
Much love,
Hilarie Mae
p.s. thanks for being patient as I transitioned to a full-time Energy Therapist and learned new life rhythm. I can’t wait to hear how your journey is going.

Thursday, May 15

a little introduction

Hey, Loves!

I know it’s been a while. I’ve missed you!
Today I want to introduce the project that’s been getting a ton of my energy and attention recently. It’s called The Raw Boudoir and it’s where my journey to body love, coaching skills, and energy work all come together. After a lifetime of hating my body, I decided to hire a coach and step way outside my comfort zone with 12 boudoir photography sessions (one a month for the whole year). On the blog I share my body love journey and the photos that Chelse, my amazing photographer, takes each month.  

Through The Raw Boudoir I offer two services. The first is private coaching to support your journey to loving your body. I’ve learned that body love is learned. It’s not acquired overnight. It’s practiced. Raw Boudoir coaching focuses on helping you learn to love your body and be proud of it exactly as it is. If coaching seems like too much for you right now but you’d like to change the relationship you have with your body, The Blissful Body Workshop is for you. It’s 30 days of body love support, including daily emails, weekly videos, and access to me if you have questions or need extra support. It's a gentle way to start or enliven body love.

If you're struggling with body image or you just want to know more about the project, contact me!


Monday, March 3

When Horses Talk - No. 4

Often when a horse isn’t handled for a long period of time, they happily remove the memory of human touch from their conscious mind and stow it away in their exceptionally strong memory banks. This one never forgot. He hadn’t been touched by a human for about year. His body arched into my hands, touch hungry. For him, it wasn’t about working on muscles or finding relief from strains or blocked trigger points, it was intentional touch.  My hands weren’t enough. I pressed my whole body against his side. One hand stretched to his shoulder, the other draped over his hip, and my head turned to the side on his bowed back. We stood like that until he felt full, until he looked back at me with gratitude. Intentional touch is how we know we are seen.

Let your horse know they are seen.